Life through my eyes......
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Stand by your Man
So I was listening to the radio yesterday (actually the internet stream of WBLS in NY) and the Wendy Williams Experience was on..if you ever get a chance listen to this lady between the hours of 2-7 expecially her advice hour..man I be crackin up at my desk. But I digress....so this guy calls up and starts saying how he was so inspired by Mrs. King and what not. While he is talking about how she kept her self looking good he said she also stood by her man. She knew he wasn't prefect yet she didn't drag his name in the mudd or even let herself go..she remained strong and did what she had to do. What went on in their house was just that in their house. Which got me to thinking about just how unfaithful the great Dr. King was and what I would have done if I were Coretta.
I mean it takes a strong woman to let other woman smile and hug all over your husband while all along smiling and shaking hands yourself. On top of that she had to deal with him being jailed and the protesting people that he dealt with. Being that he was a minister you know that also attracted those women who make it their mission to sleep with the pastor (church women can be ruthless). Yet in every picture that she is in with him, she is poised, together and might I add fierce. I mean dang, who knows what was going through her head when all around her was insane but you don't see that in her face nor in the way that she carried herself.
The man on the radio went on to say that many women these days are so quick to drop their man when they do something wrong. And if they dont' leave him, they are always throwing what the man did back in their faces making life miserable. The bad mouth them after a divorce, cause the children to hate their daddy therefore creating issues for the children as they become adults..I mean just making the family a mess. As he was talking I began to think about what I would do if I was married to a man who was in the news or a big figure in the world and there were women all around him and I knew that he had succumbed to some of the temptations. What would I do? To be honest I can only hope and pray that I would be mature about the situation and remember that first he is human and second that I loved him and third I've come this far to quit now (lol) sike but nah I mean I think you're on a whole nother level if you have a husband who holds a powerful position. I mean you have thicker skin therefore allowing you to handle things a lil bit different.
If I were a regular ole Jane, working a 9-5 and had a husband who was doing the same and not in the spotlight of the news..how would I react to his cheating or rather the women who were throwing themselves at him. If I had kids, I would seriously think about how staying in the marriage or leaving the marriage would affect them. I've learned that God allows things to come and go in our lives because he knows that we are strong enough to handle it. Only God knows why I've had a pregnancy scare but it only turned out to be stress (he knows I'm not ready for a kid, but apparently there is something to be learned from going through having a baby cause my lil sis has one) so he has something all together different planned for me. I dont' know his method to the madness...but you best believe I think about things differently now when I see someone going through something and I'm not...God knows they can handle it and I can't (everyone has their strengths and weaknesses) So I can't say at this very moment and time that I would kick my husband out..maybe burn some of his favorite clothes..then again what does that do, the effect is only temporary and then what if the fire is out of control I might burn my self or the house down..I don't think so.
I just know that when I do settle down with whoever God allows me to be with....he knows before it even occurs what will happen if we were ever faced with a situation as cheating, a child born outside of the marriage, or financial issues. I would pray and ask for his guidance....not saying I of course wouldn't have the human emotion of anger but I'm hoping I'd be more mature and have thicker skin than I do now....
So as I think about Coretta and how she must have felt knowing that Martin was unfaithful I can say that I understand why she stayed and remained so strong and poised during the fight and even after he passed (because she could have blown his spot up them, as many women do) she knew that everything that was going on was so much bigger than her. She saw the big picture and realized that being a woman about the situation would serve better than being a little girl. She knew that the vows she took when married her husband weren't just words they were a way of life for her now. It was till death do us part and not until I get sick of you or you cheat on me. I'm not saying that I would let my husband walk all over me, but I'd think long and hard about the effects of what I'd decide to do before I did it. She took her job as a wife and a mother seriously and when the time comes I plan on doing the same.
The legacy that Dr. and Mrs. King left behind will forever effect me in every aspect of my life. She as he, will be dearly missed.
HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH