Life through my eyes......
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
I want to cry because I feel as if life is constantly beating me up
I think that I am so much weaker than others think
I want to tell him that I can see him being my first last kiss
I want him to understand that he pisses me the heck off
I realize that I probably piss him off too
I need to just shut up
I wonder if this is gonna last..and if it doesn't can I deal with that
I smile just thinking about how hes changed my life since appearing
I want to be so much stronger than I am
I want to take your pain away and I can't
I wanna make things better for you and I can't, you have to do that on your own
I don't think you understand just how beautiful and wonderful you are....
I wonder where I'll be in 2 years
I think of about what kind of mommy I'd be...I can only pray that I'm like my mommy
Doubt creeps in about you and me....I try to remind myself that I'm happy and that counts for something
When you make me mad I think of stepping back from you...but that would mean I have a false sense of what a relationship is, it's not all peaches and cream
I wonder what it would be like to wake up to you each morning in your arms.....coming home to you each night.....will I get sick of you lol
It cracks me up when I realize how silly we can be....I love seeing laughter in your eyes as I try to lick you on your face LOL
I see our children in your eyes and I wonder who they will look and act like
I wonder what I'll look like when I'm pregnant..what I'll crave..and if you'll paint my toes....yea I'm weird
I think I think too much.....I know you'd agree...you'd probably also say that I talk too much :)
I wonder how God knows just what to do and when to do it....he's a hard act to follow
I think that you really do recieve what you put out into the universe...and sometimes I don't lol
I wonder how someone like Ne-yo could be blessed with such musical talent yet look so questionably weird LOL
As I'm working or not working throughout the day each of you crosses my mind and I wonder if you're ok, if life is treating you kind or unkindly and I say a prayer....that you are traveling safely, that your wedding was beautiful (hey gurl!!), that the new found love your experiencing is all that you dreamed it would be and more.....or that the love that is coming your way finds you when you least expect it (cause it's always better that way). I hope that the goals your reaching and accomplishing are coming along fine and if they aren't it means that something bigger and better is on the horizon, I pray that your move goes smoothly (BlkBFLY) and that you enjoy each day as it comes to you.
Sometimes.......I realize just how much I love writing.