Life through my eyes......
Monday, January 09, 2006
To be or not to be....REJECTED
Random conversation about do you know what happened to so and so did you hear that so and so is married and all that jazz. Amongst the updating we hit on a very intersting topic...REJECTION. Young & Wise tried to say that I'm not shy and technically I'm not when I've had a few drinks in me but there is a scared little girl inside this bubbly shell who is very much afraid of stepping outside of herself and asking a guy for his number. I see nothing wrong with approaching someone who I find attractive and letting them know it. However, it takes me a while then again it takes some liquor (lol). Then my roommate chimes in talking about I've asked guys for their number I said only after I told them they weren't getting mine or if I had once again been drinking.
So what is driving this fear of rejection? To be honest I have no clue....other than the fact that as little girls we are raised to believe that we should never chase a man or approach him for fear of being seen as too fast. So old habits die hard. I've come to be more apporachable and I've approached more men that I use to but I'm still a lil shy. That's something that perhaps I can work on in the New Year.
Another topic that we discussed was this whole view of women not being sexual creatures. Now I know as far as Honey is concerned.....I'm very sexual and romantic and whatever that entails. However I've found that most men are afraid of admitting what they really want. For example...when dating a man you can tell when things are kinda getting old and they want it to be over..the calls come few and far between....and if you do get together you don't really do anything other than activities that involve the bed. So how come he can't just come out and say " I'm not really feeling this and instead of me wasting your time and mine I'm just gonna end this now" or say "Ya know we have great sex (not in those words) but I don't feel a vibe in other ways what do you think we should do". I would much more appreciate it if he would be honest and let me know if sex is our focus or not instead of wasting my dang on time. I mean I like great sex as much as the next woman but I'll be dang on if I'm thinking it's going somewhere and it's not. I could use that extra energy on spending time with someone else and let you be my sex buddy lol (I know I can be so unshy sometimes)
So let's just say in this new year I will be much more upfront with people about not leading me on and I will do the best not to lead them on as well. I don't have time to waste and I'm sure they don't as well. But I will also understand that I can't just count someone out cause they might not appeal 100% to me for example I might like someone who is 6 feet tall but a guy askes me for my number and he's only 5'10 (lol) i know it's not that serious but some women are like that. I have come to see that some of the qualities and things that occured in one of my best relationships were things that I didn't even come to recognize until afterward. So my eyes and ears are open and my mind is clear.
We'll see how it goes.
posted @ 12:07pm