Life through my eyes......
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
As the Honey pot turns
R: I met him about 2 years ago when I graduated from college and started working at a law firm in DC. He saw me at lunch with some of my girls and I saw him. I thought he was cute, but I'm shy when it comes to confronting guys so I glanced, smiled and kept it moving. I left after we ate and he went up to my girl and asked her to give me his number. She called me at work, gave the number to me, I called him that day. He came over to my job (he worked across the street), we talked outside for about 30 min to an hour..yes I left my desk lol...and went on our first date that night....and we've been kicking it ever since. R has a son who is 4, a baby momma who is keeping his son from seeing his father alot, she's a smart woman (from what he tells me, he doen'st bad mouth her), however he's disappointed that she is angry at him and therefore attacking what she knows he wants...time with his son. Now how do I feel about R? Hmmm at first I wanted to be with him, now we've grown into a sort of weird relationship..some could say we're together, but we don't...we hang out, we kiss, we've even slept together...but we don't have a title and perhaps we never will have one..I kinda like it that way, I kinda don't. He recently lost his job (not his fault) and is looking for another one and wants to secure that before he takes on a relationship..which is understandable..he's older and I like the conversation we have....but now that I've met others who I spend more time with I think he's feeling me distancing myself.
Constant: I met him when I was a junior in college....the night of my bday. He had a massive pony tail and those juicy lips that scream LL (lol). We danced for what seemed like forever, exchanged numbers and I didn't hear from him for a week. I had gotten out of a serious relationship a year before and wasn't really feeling talking to anyone...my girls say I was depressed. However we hooked up, he would come over to the campus before work. I always liked him from the beginning but I think the first time I realized I love him would have been when I was at VIP in DC and I saw this chic all over him..and before this wouldn't have bothered me..I mean he's from DC so he knows half the people in that capital LOL....but chic was ALL over him....I was crushed...he came over, danced with me, was all hugged up on me and all I could think abotu was this chic on him....he asked me to go to breakfast with him (Georgetown Cafe I think) and I told him what was on my mind...and he said....I don't want to be with her, I want to be with you...who was I hugged up on, who did I kiss goodbye...you not her, and yea you know the rest. He joins the military...gets caught up in being in the middle of a war..and takes it upon himself to crush the hell out of my heart. Talking about he didn't know what to do or who was gonna be down for him. I mean we talked about marriage, kids and all that other nonsense and then BAMN I find out that he told some chic he was engaged to her (she has no ring and she's only seen him once, yes I know I'm not hating on her but I mean dang would you do that to yourself), on top of that he is now saying that he wanted to be with me, I was the special one, I was the one that he never meant to hurt, I was the one that he thinks of when he thinks of the future and he didn't know what he had till I left him alone....and that he wants to prove to me that he can be better than what he's shown me. Problem is...he doesn't realize that once you do me wrong like that, it takes a while for me to even own you as a friend again...more less my man. So he can do what he want, say what he wants, but I ain't backing down from leaving him alone....at least I'm praying LOL....now I can't promise that if he shows up with a ring that I won't take it and run (not run with him lol, run with the ring) I could sell that bad boy hahaha. I love him, I care aboout him, but the buck stops there
Music: I've just recently met him..we've known each other for about a month. He lives about 20 min from me. We chill during the week, cause we both have to work and on the weekends we hang out, dinner movies all that jazz. He's my age, I think maybe a couple of months older than me. I like him, cause he makes me laugh and he doesn't annoy me. He's nonchalant like Constant but not so nonchalant that I dont' know what he thinks. We play around, we laugh, we joke and we leave it at that. I won't speak on being with him right now cause we're still in the get to know one another phase and I'm good with that. Although he has a passion for music (he be in the studio lol) he has a "real" job and does the music thing when he has time....so I can dig it...he does however say that I talk loud LOL
Young One: What can be said about Young one? I met him I think last year sometime via internet. We chatted a few times on IM then it fell off. Fast forward to end of Aug this year, we started talking again cause he thought I was his cousin (we have similar screen names) and it went from there. I went to see him, and have seen him once a month since then. We talk on the phone all the time, or send IM messages or text messages. He's from DC, is in college in SC, has a son (what's with me and kids LOL..I love the kids haha), takes care of his son and has no baby momma drama, which I can respect. I love how we converse, how we can stay on the phone for hours and not say anything...how we fall asleep on the phone together...how we can just be silly together, yet serious. He'll be home for Christmas break soon..so we'll be spending more time together....hmm wonder how that's gonna be cause I'm use to only seeing him a couple of days out the month.
DC: I met DC back in April when I met Nurse Dude (remember him). We chatted on the phone, made plans to hang out and what not...then he disappeared. I get a phone call about a month and a half ago and it's him. Turns out he lost his phone while he was moving and had to get a new one. He found it when he was unpacking and decided to give me a call. So far we've done lunch, movies (twice) and breakfast. He's nice...has offered to pay my cell bill (i said no..yea I know lol) and offered to get my car cleaned (now that I can do lol). I don't want him to think I'm chillin with him cause he's offered to do things for me..cause he's really cool people. The only thing about him is, he's never home...and perhaps that's cause he's still getting stuff done to his house and it's hella cold in there LOL....but he's always at his "boys" house. And yes I've met this boy lol.....but I can remember someone telling me that when you ask someone what they are doing and they be like I'm with a friend it usually means the opposite sex. Like if I'm with my girls I'm gonna be like oh I'm with my girls...which I do, but I don't do it all the time so of course that's just a general statement..but anyway....he's cool...we chill...nothing more nothing less.
Confused: Ok, I am NOT with confused and never have been. I am only mentioning him cause he was mentioned yesterday in my random post. I met him almost 2 years ago. Come to find out he use to be roomies with Young One. They went to the same HS and the college. In the beginning me and Confused talked all the time..something similar to me and young one, however I knew he was chillin with other girls and I was kickin it with Constant at the time. So we both were doing our own thing and weren't tryin to get together. But I was going through some stuff with constant and confused was always there...listening, offering advice and what not. Enter Young One....who finds out I know Confused and informs me that confused is gay or has been rumored to be such. I say well people talk...he then provides me with proven information and I mean PROVEN that he is indeed of the opposite lifestyle. Which isn't bad but I'm not gonna be the one to turn you straight again especially when you won't even admit that you are gay (or interested in the bi life). I mean do what you do, that's not gonna stop me from being your friend...just wanting to be that type of friend LOL....I don't like to share sorry. So he IM's me the other night, telling me that he did indeed have a girl when me and him kicked it..while me and constant were not together for a period of time (and me and confused were kickin it)...although he told me that he didn't. So he lied, and he wants to be with me now cause he's ready for a relationship and he need a friend more than a relationship right now..cause he's hurting...and I'm like (I was thinking) you're confused about your sexuality am I correct...but he doesn't know that Young one has told me about all that...so I can't be like well so and so said...cause that ain't cool....but it's weird cause I know that he is and I want to be like I'm flattered but no, but I can't...so I just gotta be like well it won't work out cause your immature (which he is, no car, depends on his mom for everything, and still thinks that I'm gonna come pick him up and drop him off all the time) and you still have some things you need to deal with (which he does)
Ok so that's the recent line up LOL....or my group of friends (mens) should I say. That's not including those who I no longer mention (Nurse dude and Green Eyes) they don't deserve mentioning so great LOL...any questions?
posted @ 10:35am