Life through my eyes......
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Back to Reality
Constant: I know everyone who read the last post and who has been reading the last few posts has kinda gotten the gist of what's going on with me and Constant. Well I found out that he's leaving for 6 months (maybe a year) to go to Cuba. So he got in town last week on Wed and since I was leaving on Friday he decided to come over. We talked, I busted out crying (half out of anger half out of sadness). He hugged me and held me, told me it was ok and then proceeded to tell me how he really felt about. I fussed that we only talk via email and if it's on the phone it's for like 5 min and I'm tired of it..then he said aight I'm gonna tell you how I feel....this is for real not over the phone or via email. I was still upset had my back turned towards him and was sniffling....lol the kind of crying where when you're done you can't breathe out of one nostril. He said it's hard for me to tell you how I feel cause when I do that girls seem to always hurt me (boo get over it) so he was like I love you, and you've always been there for me it took time for me to see that. Kept telling me that things were going to be ok with us and that we've always made it through the other times he's been gone (the longest was 3 months...6 months is longer boo and it could be a year). He spent the night and took me to work in the morning, first he complained about that then he said I complained and got out the car too fast but hey I don't want you to do nothing for me that you don't want to do. Now with that being said he had a wedding to go to on Monday and told me that since he was leaving on Tues he would come over after the wedding...do you think he showed up....NO HELL NO. Was I pissed...a lil, I expected that. But what I didn't expect was to get a phone call at like 3am talking about he got pulled over by the cops cause they thought he was drinking and driving but that he was aight and for me to call him when I got his message...I did that....did he call me back...let's just say if I was holding my breath I would be DEAD!!! And here it is Wed and he's already on his way to Mississippi to catch a plane to Cuba.....so F it. You talk a good game but you can't seem to keep up with what you saying....so these 6 months to a year that 's he gone....he can be his own boo boo. I don't give a crap. It just blows me that you are leaving the freaking country and I see you once.....and you think that's ok......boo you got a problem a serious one. How dare you not even call me and when I do call you back you don't even have the decency to return my call. WHAT THE HELL!!!! Ok, I'm sad that he's left or leaving or whatever cause there is a possibility that he might not come back...if I didn't say that I would be lying...I created this blog to be honest with myself and to vent and that's what I'm doing. So ok he was at my house in my bed and wiping my tears away but not less than 48 hours later he was yankin my heart out again.....errrrrrrrr. Dang I need a drink.
Nurse Dude: Was on pins and needles for a second cause he be acting a lil suspect. He went to Miami for the holiday and the night before I left he came over to say good bye and watch me pack..yep lol that's all that happened LOL. He was riding with his boy to the mall so I picked him up from there and we proceeded to head back to my house. I was packing, trying to clean, trying to get my hair done and all that other nonsense. He called me when he got there and he called me on his way back. Yesterday he came over and we went to the movies to see X-Men:The last stand (it was pretty good then again I LOVE XMEN), before that we had dinner at the Ruby Tuesdays' that's next to it, so it was nice...we had a lil convo about what's going on with us, I told him about Constant..of course not all the details..he told me about his vacation, I told him about mine he asked if I got any while I was down there and I asked him if he got some....he said no, I said no. He said why do that when he had to come back home to reality and all that jazz. Meanwhile he's texting on his phone and I had to threaten to take his phone away while we were in the movie cause he was all up in it. I was like dang do you need it to be glued to your ear..tell her you'll call her back then he started laughing and was like it's not even like that. I was like yea aight.....of course during dinner there was more said about how we should talk more in the near future about being together but for right now we decided that we would just spend more time together and see how that goes. Which is fine with me, no rush needed. But I would like to see him more just to get a better feel of what I think about him and to see if he's really being suspect. So after dinner and the movie he came back over, played with Giz (who by the way has a new cage and it's pretty nice, since he knocked the other one over he can't jump over this one) he calls Giz his son lol....my girls said we are like a lil family. Then he's like I have to go and I was like why and he said cause one of my boys needs to talk to me....I was like huh and I must have got this real mean look on my face cause he was like I know you mad, I'll make it up to you..I'll come over tomorrow after work I promise....I was like you mean to tell me that you leaving cause one of your boys needs to talk to you...he was like well he said it's important and he needs to see me face to face...I was like hmmm aight well tell her I said hey and it must be real good and he was like it's not like that I promise and I was like aight it's whatever do what you want.....and he kept saying I'm comin over tomorrow I'm gonna make it up to you....we can even spend the whole weekend together....yea yea....whatever. How come just when you think things are chill, they turn around and say some stupid crap out they mouth....so back to what I said a couple of posts ago....I like nurse dude, it's all good but I'm glad I ain't head over heels.....I'm not saying he lying but you get what I'm saying...I got both eyes open
Thursday, May 25, 2006
It's a MeMe Thursday
1.WOULD YOU GET BACK WITH YOUR EX IF YOU COULD? He lives in TX....so no lol
2. WHAT KIND OF SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? some lil shirt from Tar'get
3. HAVE YOU MADE OUT WITH ANYONE ON YOUR BLOG ROLL*?No
4. DO YOU HAVE "A THING" FOR ANYONE ON YOUR BLOG ROLL? LOL Nope sorry
5. HOW MANY PEOPLE ON YOUR BLOG ROLL DO YOU KNOW/HAVE YOU MET IN REAL LIFE? ZERO sad I know since some of them live in the area....sidenote: We need to hang out!!!
6. HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED ANY SPORTS? Tennis for a semester in HS
7. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT TO HAVE? 3-5
8. DO YOU HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH BOTH YOUR PARENTS? Yes I love them dearly
9. DO YOU MAKE OVER 40K A YEAR? Over no I wish lol
10. WHAT NAME WOULD YOU WANT TO HAVE BESIDES THE ONE YOU HAVE? Why would I want another name
11. WOULD YOU EVER MAKE OUT WITH SOMEONE OF THE SAME SEX? Now in this dream am I a man or a woman LOL
12. WHAT IS YOUR MOTHER'S NAME? Maggie
13. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST BDAY? I had a whole week of events, got a massage, my hair done, dinner, drinks, stripper dance...I love my friends
14. WHAT'S YOUR MAIN RINGTONE ON YOUR PHONE? I'm gonna be by Donnell Jones (I can't wait till his CD comes out)
15. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP? Well I set the alarm for 645 to walk the dog, got back in the bed and changed it to 745 cause Constant was still sleeping (later story lol)
16.WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT TWO NIGHTS AGO? Passed out..sleep
17. HOW MANY EX'S ARE ON YOUR BLOG ROLL LIST? None!
18. DO YOU LIKE HAVING YER HAIR PULLED? Sometimes, but not right after I get it did LOL
19. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN'T WAIT TO DO? Get off work and head to SC tomorrow
20. LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM? Sunday
21. DO YOU GET ALONG WITH YOUR SIBLINGS? Most of the times you know how females can be they get worse when their fam (but one of my lil sisters is going with me to SC so we shall see)
22. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WISH YOU COULD CHANGE ABOUT YOURSELF? I love a lil too hard at times
23. IF YOU HAD $250,000...HOW WOULD YOU SPEND IT? Pay off my bills
24. Which bloggers on your blogroll would you hang out with? Hmm anyones really cause they all seem pretty aight LOL.....Tenacious we need to drinks at Love or H20 so I can take pics of the people on my cam and talk about you on my blog LOL
25. HAVE YOU EVER READ THE BLOGGER NEWS PAGE? Nope
26. LAST PERSON YOU CALLED? Ween (we were talking about Myrtle Beach)
27. LAST THING YOU ATE? Chips
28. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE MONTH? October
29. YOUR LEAST FAVORITE MONTH? Hmmm dont' really have one
30. WHAT'S THE LAST PIECE OF CLOTHING YOU BORROWED FROM ANY ONE?? A t-shirt
31. WHO IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES RIGHT NOW? No one as of now but earlier this woman cause I was talking to someone who sits beside her and she busted in on the convo boo just cause you got dog hearing don't mean I was talkin to you
32. MOST VISITED WEBPAGE? Blogger pages and yahoo email LOL..shout out to those who sent me an IM yesterday cause you know I love getting them
33. LAST PERSON YOU TEXT MESSAGED? Rodney
34. LAST PERSON THAT MADE YOU SAD? Constant (he's going to Cuba for 6 months)
35. WOULD YOU TAKE A BULLET FOR YOUR BEST FRIEND? I don't know, she irk me sometimes now throwing down and yelling I might do lol
36. FAVORITE TYPE OF DRINK? I actually love strawberry soda
37. FAVORITE FOOD?Pasta
38. FAVORITE PIE? Peanut butter cheesecake..does that count
39. HAVE YOU BEEN TO EUROPE? No but I want to go to another country by my 25th bday
40. IF SOMEONE YOU HATED DIED, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? Pray that their family is ok then pray that I'm not happy that they died..God dont' like ugly
41. DO YOU OWN A DIGITAL CAMERA? No hopefully gettin one this weekend
42. ARE YOU IN LOVE? Hmmm I love him but as I told Ween yesterday Love aint' got nothin to do with Like
posted @ 12:44pm
I was bored and if you are too feel free to have at it...let me know if you do it so I can read your answers
Monday, May 22, 2006
I'm 100 posts old!!!!!!!! (EDITED)
Why did I find out yet again that DMV in VA sucks monkey nuts!!!!
I haven't seen nurse dude in a week yet he send me a text talking about he wants to see me..boo you could have seen me this weekend.
My parents didn't want me driving back home with no license so my daddy drove me here and my mom came and picked him up.....he said that's what dad's are for......I LOVE THEM!!!
I miss my Ja-Ja (my nephew)
My boss's left to go to ATL and I will be peacin out at 430...great
I want to move out of VA just cause I'm tired of the DMV, isn't that crazy....I feel like a black man LOL
I can't wait to be in Myrtle Beach getting a nice tan.....although I don't need to tan that much...I do burn...and yes my skin peels when I burn....my friends said that's the white in me LOL
I'm down 25 pds...whooooooo hoooooooo. If I keep on this path I should surpass my goal at the end of the year or by the new year....slowly is the way to go can't be lookin all crackish LOL
I can't believe I've written 100 posts since I started this thing.......although like 2 of them are mostly pics...ah well
I'm trying to decide what and if I'm going to do something for nurse dudes bday.....
For once I have nothing to say other than I HATE DMV!!!!!
Are cops trained to give off a condesending attitude..I mean I aint' no criminal but you make me feel like one and what's up with waiting in the car for almost an hour just for a ticket...boo I got a kid in the back let's hurry it up.....
My landlords think they running game..boo you ain't gettin my money if you think you are you got the wrong sister......
It's Monday what else more is there to say.............this one isn't as sucky as the past ones LOL
In honor of my 100 post I'm gonna do that whole 100 things about me so sit back, take your time and get to know me a lil better.
1. I'm the second oldest of 4 children (but the oldest of the 3 girls that I live with)
2. My favorite color is blue
3. I love starches (rice, pasta, bread, etc)
4. I love gravy absolutely love it.
5. I eat ranch dressing on almost everything
6. I want 3-5 children
7. I have to close the closet door before I can go to bed (when I was little I saw this scary movie and since then I know nothing is coming out but it's habit now lol)
8. I tend to hold my emotions in and then cry one big cry which of course isn't always good.
9. I tend to love a little too hard at times (more than the person deserves)
10. I'm adopted (was adopted when I was 2 1/2)
11. I want to adopt children...see I hope you didn't think I was gonna have almost 6 kids naturally LOL.....
12. I hate snails
13. I use to play with ants when I was little
14. I use to wet the bed too....ewww I can't believe I'm telling this lol...but it stemmed from traumatic experiences from my biological mother
15. I have an obsession with shoes..I will buy the same shoe in 2 diff colors
16. I love writing.....which leads me to believe I need to get into a career researching and writing stuff....who knows
17. I'm stubborn
18. I love sun glasses..have a whole box full
19. I call my car Blueberry
20. I'm a sappy romantic
21. I dated a guy in Texas for almost 2 years and saw him once.....which is one of the reasons why we broke up LOL
22. I love Law & Order, Medium, CSI, and House
23. I will plan my TV night LOL
24. The youngest person I've dated just turned 20..not too bad but interesting.
25. The oldest person I've dated is about to turn 30...not to bad either
26. My favorite drink is a Tom Collins
27. If I'm trying to get nice I drink gin and ginger ale
28. My tolerance for alchol sometimes changes LOL
29. Although I can sleep in on the weekends my body usually wakes up around 845 and I watch cartoons then go back to sleep.
30. I love to just get in the car and drive....my mom use to take my sisters and I to look at houses when we were little.....gas is too high now so of course I don't do this too much.
31. I love the group Ruff Endz...they came out with like 3 cds but I love them just the same.....Someone to Love you will always be my favorite song.
32. I have a fear of getting old and dying with like 50 cats around me...at least I know Giz will be there then again I dont' think he's gonna live that long....aww I don't want to think about that
33. When my girls and I go out you can guarantee something is going to happen...a flat tire, an lesbien gettin mad cause we ain't givin up none, or meeting some ugly dude who someone has given their number to in a dark bar and he's mad she don't remember him LOL
34. When I'm with someone I change my ringer to match how I feel about them
35. I have to sleep on the right side of my bed...if i end up on the left that's fine but I have to start out on the right...the side facing the television
36. I want to go to another country on or before my 25th bday.
37. Although I dont have any kids I sometimes wonder what it would be like if one of those "scares" had been real
38. I sometimes hid my insecurities by laughing
39. When I first meet someone I can be 99.9% sure that I'm gonna like them or not..I was wrong once with a friend of mine and she is one of my closest friends now..I thought she was gonna be bougie.
40. Might sound funny but sometimes I want a butt reduction LOL LOL
41. I still wear my high school class ring.....
42. I don't wear gold.......I have gold jewlery but only wear it with certain things
43. I've never met my biological father..he didn't even know my sisters and I had been adopted...WOW
44. When I met my biological family I noticed where I got my loudness from...the only difference is I know that there is a time and a place for all that and they dont' LOL..it's funny when I'm with my fam then go to visit them they curse and all that and my fam doesn't.
45. I have a nephew who will be 2 next month..my sis got preg with him when she was suppose to be in Job Corps..umm hmmm
46. I check my email like a gazillion billion times LOL....especially when I have nothing to do.
47. I absolutely love pens....when I go to a conference or when I attended job fairs I would go to tables just to get pens.
48. I love the rain
49. I love going to museums
50. I think I'm going to apply to Howard for grad school
51. I cry when I watch the Notebook.....every time
52. I'm shy......so I guess you could call me an intro extravert LOL
53. I love kids
54. I eat cheese on my grits
55. Moments of insecurities often find me at the wrong moment LOL....causing me to question myself.....I've learned to stop that or rather minimize it..I mean it's a human emotion
56. I can cut you off in a second if I feel like you've done me wrong and will still talk to you....sounds shady huh nope, you'll know I dont fool with you like before but I won't be mean to you
57. I love the aspect of being married, praying that God sends me a wonderful man....add me to your prayer list LOL
58. I want to name my first little girl Kamaria (means like the moon) Janey. Unless her dad disputes but her first name will be Kamaria.
59. I hate math unless it deals with my money
60. I've been natural for a year (nooo perms WOW, didn't think I could do it lol)
61. When going on a date I tend to try at least 10 outfits on leaving my room looking like a level 12 hurricane went through it.
62. Out of all the shoes I have I think one of them matches at least a couple of things in my closet...I have every color...except purple I'm working on that.
63. When I go on a road trip I have to listen to Marc Dorsey's I crave song about 3 times...and you can't tell me I ain't singing lol
64. I have entertained the thought of being a stripper.....back to the shy part LOL
65. I've heard that my thoughts carry over onto my facial expression
66. I have a fear of running out of gas on a dark road so I try to keep my car at a half tank
67. I like reading....I can read like 5 books a week or more depending
68. When I'm real tired I have to turn the TV off
69. I love playin Mah Jong...it's a chinese solitare game
70. My favorite time of the day....is around 11am or noon because it's just right outside. Now if I'm at work my favorite time of the day is when I get off LOL
71. I love buying music from when I was in middle school and high school (so for real, brownstone, etc) I tend to buy up amazon.com LOL
72. I want to purchase a home in two years hopefully after grad school
73. I'm not picky but you can turn me off just by saying stupid crap out of your mouth...for example this guy I use to talk to told me he wasn't looking for a relationship but he was looking for sex...thanks for being honest but why would you assume that I want to be your sex buddy LOL...he wore too much vaseline on his lips and talked like he had a cold ALL THE TIME!!!
74. It pains me (or should I say bothers me alot) that older men play the same games that lil boys play
75. I met my first serious boyfriend on blackplanet we were together almost a year and we still talk and are good friends....I cried when it was over (family, job, personal issues)
76. I love making breakfast will eat it at any time of the day
77. I love white zin.....had some last night with dinner
78. When I'm not into someone anymore I delete them from my phone I have even once changed my number..I tend to do that every two years or so LOL...just so some old flame can't pop up and call me
79. I tend to be indecisive sometimes...it's the Libra in me....I try not to be though
80. My parents say I talk alot and talk fast when I get angry or excited....
81. I dream of having my own office so I can slam the door in people's faces when they annoy me or tell them to show themselves out.....
82. I love wearing blazers it's my new thing lol
83. In the summer I don't wear too many shorts but I'll wear skirts and gauchos
84. I love reading a book in the tub...it relaxes me
85. I worry too much for my own good...I tend to overanalyze as well
86. I already have the shoes I want to wear to my wedding insane I know lol I don't even have a potential husband
87. I can get loud and irate when you push my buttons
88. When I get angry I cry
89. I love watching Matlock
90. I just recently started smiling when I take pics I use to do the whole closed mouth smile
91. I have like 20 blogs I read everyday
92. I love going to church....it makes me feel renewed
93. Sometimes listening to music makes me cry....it's only on certain things
94. I ted to be difficult I've heard....meaning I have a come back for almost everything.
95. I love Target I can go in there and easily spend 100 dollars
96. When I ride the metro I tend to wonder what people are thinking or where they are going....making up stories
97. I love writing letters versus emails
98. My favorite meal to cook is chicken and shrimp alfredo
99. I LOVE the salad bar at Ruby Tuesday's
100. My friends tell me I'm a wonderful listener and if they ever need me they know I'm there come rain, shine, sleet, snow, hailstorm or flat tire LOL
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
(EDITED) Getting over the Hump
At this moment I'm thinking that:
I'm so ready to freakin go home why can't I find a millionaire sexy black man to marry LOL (if I did find out I doubt something would jump off)
Nurse dude must have sensed what I was feeling....he called yesterday and twice today to say he was thinking of me.
Constant finally called and I made the convo last 2 min...hi, how are you (he's going back out to sea and will be back on Friday) and ok take care bye.
It's easy gaining weight but it takes TIME for it to come off.
I'm going to start using my food journal again that seemed to help.
My nephew is the funniest lil person I know right now....he was tryin to snap his fingers to lean with it rock with it and hold up the peace sign but he ends up holding all his fingers up.
I'm going to have decide what I want to do with myself in the future....Law school or Grad school...and it needs to be soon!!!
I'm wondering if Nurse dude is running game.....no reason it's just a thought we females tend to have everyonce in a while
Why has my roommate not been home this whole week..ok I'm not her mom but dang if you gonna move out then take your CRAP!! LOL let me stop she'll be gone soon enough to live with her boo.....whatever
Why must people irk me I mean does it look like you need to say hey to me each time you pass my desk/cubicle...I have seen you 3 times already..enough!
My roomie is a suga momma I know her boo is loving it...too bad she can't pay her own dang on bills.
Is it too much to ask that you call when you come back in town I mean ok I'm confused or rather you are confused about what we are but we're friends so why not call to say you got home ok....freaking loser!
Chicken Little is the cutest movie...I'm gonna have to buy it (yes for me and not my nephew lol)
I'm gonna see if I can burn a DVD on my laptop haven't tried that yet.
I'm coloring my hair next week a honey blond color...hopefully I don't look too scary.
I wonder is Myrtle Beach going to be as nice as it was last year.
People on the metro are weird....this one lady got mad cause I almost stepped on her toe...boo if you would not sit on the outside and take up all the seat, I mean I was squashed up against the window..then when I got out I wouldn't almost step on your fat foot.
Why am I aggressive with some guys but semi-aggressive with others. For example one of my friends called last night and I fussed at him cause he asked me to call him at 6:30am to wake him up I said boo I get up at 6:45 not 6:30 set your alarm....it wasn't that serious cause I use to call an ex of mine each morning to wake him up or he would call me to get up for class when i was in college....but I just didn't feel like doing it for this friend cause he already assumes stuff and you know what you do when you ASSUME......
Is it just me or does Donnie Simpson remind you of a old drunk uncle at a cookout. I mean he's funny but that laugh has got to go....
I have to go home this weekend to drop my sis and nephew off and turn right around and come back...great what was I thinking when I did that lol...that I miss them both dearly and I dont' get to see them often I guess
My ex sent me an email stating he misses me and what not...boo you are weird and you still live in TX I'm not going there again. How you gonna not talk to me for like 3 months and think we still together...yea he did that till I informed him of the newsflash that he apparently missed.
I'm not buying another bathing suit I found one from last year that still had the price tag on it lol..great
I saw my first boyfriend this weekend at church my mom said he might actually turn out to be my husband in the future..yea right this from the woman who forbid me to see him...ok I was in all of elementary, middle and HS and he was seen as one of the bad boys at church but I mean dang I'm over that lol
I get to get a new phone next month courtesy of New Every Two...I think I'm gonna get the V....it's bigger than what I'm use to but I like the features.
What is the purpose of Mondays?
I WON!!!! Well not me...Danielle off of Top Model. I am sooo excited..she deserves it. How come when we win something we can never believe it lol...she was like Mommy I'm a cover girl...me I won. I'm happy for her cause Nicole was gettin on my nerves she looks a hot mess and I wouldn't buy cover girl if she gave it away. In other news I dyed my hair and it's a honey blond color guess I'll post a pic sometimes in the future LOL....and the man I saw beside this morning smelled like old syrup. Plus he was playin around on his laptop..boo you aint' special everyone and their momma got one these days....
posted @ 1:45pm
Monday, May 15, 2006
Ok back the regularly scheduled program.....
Tell em why you mad SON!!!!!
Friday I got off early cause Giz(my dog) had to go to the vet and get updated on his shots...man I'm so glad I don't have any human kids cause his 2 lil shots and deworming cost me dang on almost $100. Good thing he doesn't have to go back unless something happens for another year. Anywho so Nurse dude was suppose to go with me (my girls said he acts like Giz's dad, lol) and to make a long story short he didn't come cause he said traffic coming over the WW bridge (from MD to VA) had too much traffic and could we hook up later on that night...fine with me I was kinda like dang I wanted to see him earlier but no biggie. So I take Gizmo to the vet, come home chill out and then shower and try to ransack my closet to determine what to wear, good thing the roomie comes home and she helps me determine what to wear, I had clothes all over the place.
Instead of him paying attention he gets lost coming to my house so we just decided to meet at the movie theater...I go there and we try to decide where to go from there and end up at Tysons' Corner at the Fridays out there...it was nice. We talked and what not. Had a discussion about how in order to get to know a woman these days a man has to spend so much that's understandable I can get with that cause as lil girls we are taught that the man is suppose to pay and what not so if a guy wants to get to know a female he has to take her out especially if she doesn't want him coming over her house and she doesn't want to go over his. I told him I agree somewhat but me personally I like simple stuff and I like to go one dates where I can talk to you and interact with you..if we at the movies I can't do that unless it's before the movie or after. I like to see how you deal with my space and how you live and how you are when you don't have outside forces distracting you. Then he said I'm not ready to be his boo yet and I was like how you figure (not saying I am but just wanted to know his reasoning) and he said if I was ready to be booed up then when he told me his daughter had a bday I would have been like here take this lil barbie (yes he said that but he just generally meant anything I guess) and take this to her. SILENCE. WHAT. So before I said anything I had to calm down and breathe easy.
I said you know what first of all when your daughters' bday came up I had only known you a couple of weeks, second I've been down that road before where I dated a guy and fell in love with his kid and it didn't work and I'm not tryin to do that, third just because I don't do something doesn't mean that I haven't thought about it, cause truth be told I did think about gettin her a lil doll or something but I didn't know how you would feel about that and if you would think that I was trying to use your daughter to get you to like me, therefore I just didn't do anything. Then I said I think lots of things that I would love to do for you but I don't act on them because we havne't known each other that long and I want to take my time and get to know you. Then he comes out of his mouth talking about well that's what I do, I test people. I was like what?! I don't have time for games boo you dont' have to test me from interacting with me this last almost 2 or 3 months you should know I'm not materialistic, I don't want your money and he was like I know I can tell you're interested and I said so why test me. I asked him if most girls that he dealt with were materialitic and he was like yea and I said well you know I'm not like that so when I'm around you don't pull your money out..I don't want to know how much your shoes cost....and yes he does this, I don't care what you got on as long as you dont look like a hot piece of crap. So calm that mess down.
After that lil discussion...and me calming down (I mean I wasn't too hype but I mean dang you're darned if you take it slow and you're darned if you rush things). He said he wants to spend more time together but I'm not too sure, he said he's not dealing with anyone else cause he wants to see where this could go but truth be told I saw a text he sent his boy and is said "Nah that was the other day this is a diff one"???? Hmm, now what should I think....well the circumstances surrounding this were that he was talking to his roomie about going to Georgetown and he said he had to work so he wouldn't be going..so of course I'm thinking that it means nah that was Jessica yesterday this is honey tonight, meaning his roomie thought he was with the person he was with the other day......ok I could be reading into it wrong of course I could be but hey it is what it is these days and I would rather you be honest I mean it's fine if you say we just chillin and we chillin with others and we both know this but don't be like yea girl I like you and I'm feeling you I'm not dealing with no one else and I find out you lied....it's so much easier to be honest..isn't it? So Nurse dude is cool, I'm just glad I'm not tooo hyped about him and how he is. I'm precautious which is how dating should be....he's on the other side of the booth we haven't decided to sit on the same side yet lol..so I'm good. We shall see what occurs this week.
College is out for the summer so most of my friends who are still in school are now at home, are graduating this weekend or have just graduated and are calling me to catch up. So this should be interesting, lots of parties to attend and things to do this summer. A guy friend of mine asked about nurse dude and was like well i'm home now you keep talking about you don't know about him so I'm gonna move in and do what I do...I was like umm no thanks LOL..then he said I know you disappointed in him and I said how do you know and he was like well something that he says he's doing to do and he doesn't do like that whole taking Giz to the Dr. He said I was excited about nurse dude going with me...yes I was lol I can't help it lil things make me happy and he couldn't come I was a lil disappointed but not that disappointed. Then my friend said it's other stuff he ain't doing right but it's all good cause I'm here now..I was like umm boo not for real LOL
Whyy did I find out my lil godsister (I have lots of them) is pregnant, she's graduting from HS in June but I mean still. When my lil sister got pregnant her parents were like how did that happen cause my mom is a minister and my dad is a deacon and we have been in the church all out lives..mind you I think her parents were wayyy stricker than our parents and now they see that you can teach your kid all you want and in the long run they are still gonna do what they want to do. She's sorry for what she did and apologized to her parents and to God and she wants to make the best of this and what not. So her mom was talking to my mom cause of course they never thought any of thier children would be pregnant before they got married especially not the youngest ones...her baby is due in Aug and she's having a lil boy if I'm correct. I also noticed that there are lots of pregnant women during the summer..you know what goes on during the spring and winter huh LOL...
I can't wait till next weekend..this week I'm serious about the dieting I have 4 more pounds to lose (I know I can't lose those healthly in a week don't worry but one more won't hurt lol) so I'm at where I wanted to be at by the time I left...it's somewhat near my target goal but I've given myself till my bday to reach that so I'm good. Everyone at church yesterday told my mommie that I was slimming down...yes!!! It is working lol, my mom is soo funny we bought her a outfit for mothers day since she's lost weight and most of her clothes are too big. She got a pair of white capris which some pink and green flowers on the bottom with a matchin pink blazer and some pink slides along with some khaki capris and some lil shirts to wear with her jeans and stuff. She was saying she gonna be looking cute, I'm just glad she had a nice day...me, my dad and my sis cooked dinner for her. We had fried chicken, shrimp, and fish with string beans, mac and cheese with potatoe salad and rolls...emmm yummy.
One of my friends just found out that he's going to be gone to Iraq for a whole year!!! WOW. We had a conversation about how his ex girl continues to judge him on how he acted during HS. Mind you he has put her on a pedestial, want to know how I know this...he said he was attracted to me and then in the next sentence we talked about ex's and he said I love my first love she is the bomb, blah,blah, blah. Pretty much making me think that if she popped up and was like I love you he'd be like ok and drop whoever he was with at the moment like a bad molded potatoe. He said it wasn't like that and after their convo last night he doesn't even know how he feels about her anymore cause you don't treat people like she treats people and all that. I told him maybe she realizes that she does still love him but wants to test him and see if he's for real or maybe she's still hurt and is making it difficult for him just cause she wants to or ever that she doesn't like him anymore and she's moved on. He said he didn't know and he was tired of being alone and what not, I was like well don't rush it cause you might start letting straglers in...lol. Meaning if he is constantly like I'm so alone, I want to be with someone then he might lower his standards. He's such a sweet guy. Then he was like what if we got together I was like umm well then we just would but how about we continue being friends like we are now, cause I like that lol. Too much going on right now.
Constant has been home since Thursday and I have yet to hear from him..yes I'm horrible, I called him on Sat once I got home just to let him know that I got there ok, left a message and he never returned my call......enough said. My mom told me something this weekend that I'm going to def have to remember she said don't sugar coat anything, tell it like it is and if he can't accept that then move on baby, leave it up to God. I told her that when I come home after the fam, I try to make it a point to see him or visit and he's not doing the same. She said well your making him a priority and he isn't doing the same that's not fair...and of course she's right. So as much as it hurts to think that once again I've let myself give him the benefit of the doubt he's proved me wrong. He will be in DC on the 23rd and I leave to go to SC for the weekend on the 26th. I don't know how long he will be here, and right at this moment I don't care. Cause I know he won't make it a point to make time for me and I'm not canceling plans or not seeing nurse dude cause constant doesn't deserve my time right now. I'm trying so hard to be strong.....
My sis and my nephew are visiting me for the week. He'll be 2 in June and he is the funniest lil person I know lol. Last night he was up till about 1130, knowing good and well that he is usually in the bed by 8 or 9. Once he got ready to go to bed he was like g'night auntie and kept opening and shutting my door saying g'night then he wanted to say good night to Gimo.....that's what he calls Gizmo LOL. He was like I wanna see doggie then he would see Giz and run off screaming LOL...too funny. He had a pillow on my bed yesterday laying on it watching TV...too grown. Kids grow up so fast.
Well it's Monday, it's raining and if I'm not mistaken I'm feeling a lil cold coming on...so you know how I'm feeling right now. I might have to roll out early cause the bosses are gone on travel. Have a wonderful week and of course I'll be stopping by to see how your weekend was...so get to updating LOL
Monday, May 08, 2006
Meet me at the party it's going down.....
Friday I chilled pretty much went to dinner with one of the girls, came home and was on the phone and knocked out by 11pm. Saturday we got up and did stuff around the house until it was time to go to the commissary to get the groceries for the party. Man I told my roomie that from now on we are grocery shopping on base..I got some hamburger helper for 1.50 and it was the twin pack...I was hype I tell ya and they had chicken on sale. So yea I'll be there bout once a month . We get home and my roomies parents are there from out of town and they wanted to go out on the town so we took them to H2O. When I say that their parents are off the chain I mean they are off the chain. Mom was killin em with a sequin halter shirt on and some wide leg pants and dad on some red shirt with a strip shirt and black pants. We had a ball and the roomie got a shout out from the DJ..so we were doing it big lol.....I also saw Stephon Malbury...he looks so much better in person and why were those fools charging $500 to get in VIP....I'll be dang on.
Aight so if you've been reading my blog you know that this weekend was my room mates (twins) 24th birthday. We hd a cookout and there were about 15-20 people that came. Since one of the roomies dang on near pushed her boyfriends number on me I had to make sure I gave him something to do so that she would leave me the hell alone about it (of course I don't like him so sad to say I wanted him to mess up) The cookout was suppose to start at 3pm and of course "we" can't start on time, but he won't even here with the matchlight yet and when he did get here we had to wait so long for the coals to cool down that we ate other stuff first. He picked up the cake but he picked that up late as well, he was sociable I guess but I think it was all a front cause when he comes over here they are always in her room. Ah well but back to the party...so we playing music and jammin and mom and dad are killin em. There was so much food and sad to say it rained a lil later which put a damper on the outside activities but we just brought it inside and it was soo much fun. We got to catch up with people we hadn't seen since last year sometime so it was really nice.
Nurse guy came over and my girls LOVED HIM. They kept talking bout I don't need to mess it up with him and he asked me what would I think about spending more time with him and could I see him being my man. I was like ummmm.....we'll have to discuss that at a later point and time LOL. He was on the grill and no one even asked him to be on it, he was talking to my roomies mom and dad and being very sociable and I loved that about him. Man he got madd cool points yesterday. He has Friday off and suggested I do the same so we can spend the whole day together. I'm not gonna take the whole day off maybe half cause I have to take Giz to the vet anyway, so we shall see. I'm going home for Mothers Day so we won't have our normal Sunday date. So we shall see if we really spend more time together.
In other news, Constant has been emailing me and saying that he does have love for me. Yet he sends me an email with this lil quote in an email about how you should love the person who loves you more and you can't make someone love you and I was like boo you can be my friend I ain't mad. I mean dang what are you tryin to say then he said I have love for you.....on top of that he will be in Iraq for a year and not just 6 months. Hmmm, talk about a test. He'll be home in a couple of weeks and we'll talk face to face but to be honest I like Nurse dude and I want to see where this could go.
So as you can see, my weekend was crazy and fun and I am so mad that it's Monday.....
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
I'm Lovin it...
Constant has been sending me emails..of course I knew this was going to happen cause it always does when he is out to sea. He says that he cares about me and even loves me he just has a hard time showing his emotions. Ok boo that's all well and good but is that what you are going to keep saying....so he still doesn't have a clear sense of what he wants and trust me I don't have time for that..I'm realizing that. I mean how can you say I care about you and then when you see the person you just act all laddy dah like you don't have the slightest clue what caring about someone is.
Nurse dude and I have made plans to hang out tomorrow night..we shall see if he follows through. I've heard alot about men going through this whole I'll call you later, and then they don't phase....and yes this brother is not immune. I let him slide sometimes cause he's such a cutie. So we shall see if we hang out, if not I'll probably see him on Sunday. The funny thing is he doesn't call me Honey-Libra he calls me big bootie LOL.....ok it is kinda cute but I mean dang so I told him to call me by my name or somethin else cause although I have a nice back package I don't want to be reminded of it all that time LOL.....cause if I ever forget the way my jeans fit will quickly remind me or the homeless man that is on the street where I work will inform me.
Since I have a new toy (my laptop) I can watch tv upstairs and be online at the same time. I have wireless internet on the comp but I don't have a wireless router on my laptop yet which means I'm tapping into someone else's wireless in order to be online...hmm I wonder if that's illegal....ah well I've been doing it since Sat so I guess if that person cared they would find me and arrest me or threatned me lol anyway I'm watching House and ANTM. Man I tell ya this is the one time I wish that I knew how to work picture in picture cause I love me some Hourse and the fact that they made the black guy sick is killing me, I mean why him how come it couldn't be that lil cry baby girl who is always whining about crap. Now we come to find out that he is paralyzed. I wonder what is going to happen next week.
Furonda is going home......Ok, so I think Jade is kinda weird but she just might win...NOT. I heard that Joanie is going to win. I kinda like Danielle and even if she doesn't win, she will get lots of work cause she just got it like that...I mean she had her gap closed, she was in the hospital...what more can a girl go through....she is straight gangsta even though she is from the country LOL
I can't wait for the weekend...and for those of you who haven't updated....do so NOW LOL..sike who am I to tell you to update cause after this one I probably won't update till Monday...this weekend should be very funfilled......we're having a cookout for the roomies 24th bday thier mom is coming so we're taking her to the club on Sat night and we get to see people we havent' seen in a minute at the cookout, so between buying food and party planning I will be one busy sista.......
Monday, May 01, 2006
Why must people look a mess?!
Just because it's hot outside does not mean you have to look a hot mess...this is what I saw yesterday while at the grocery store getting dinner. Mind you this is not the whole get-up. She had on green earrings and pink nails with designs on them and to top if off ashy powder ankles and legs...
CAN WE SAY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
posted @ 5:11pm